LaLa

I was skimming through Yahoo Odd News while taking a break from Shakespeare...

You've got to love competitions like this:

Oddest Book Title of the Year award:
- 1997: "The Joy of Sex: Pocket Edition."
- 1998: "Development in Dairy Cow Breeding and Management: and New Opportunities to Widen the Uses of Straw."
- 1999: "Weeds in a Changing World."
- 2000: "High Performance Stiffened Structures."
- 2001: "Butterworths Corporate Manslaughter Service."
- 2002: "Living with Crazy Buttocks."
- 2003: "The Big Book of Lesbian Horse Stories."
- 2004: "Bombproof Your Horse."
- 2005: "People Who Don't Know They're Dead: How They Attach Themselves to Unsuspecting Bystanders and What to Do About It."
- 2006: "The Stray Shopping Carts of Eastern North America: A Guide to Field Identification."
- 2007: "If You Want Closure In Your Relationship, Start With Your Legs."
- 2008: "The 2009-2014 World Outlook for 60-milligram Containers of Fromage Frais"

I want Sevens tickets but I didn't manage to get them this weekend. *boo*
However, I am going to visit the orphanage and dinner and drinks after *yay*

And Then God Said...

It's the middle of Lent and Easter is 19 days away. My resolution to stop shopping lasted about three days... I know this is a terrible reflection of my willpower, and I am not proud of it. However, God forgives our transgressions and if I make every effort to continue Lent as it should be kept, then surely, I can redeem myself? Until my credit card bill arrives.

I was having dinner with the pseudo-lawyer and the Singaporean and conversation turned to my lack of male companionship ahahaha. It has been a subject my mother has been picking at for ages, and has very correctly pointed out that Rome was not built in a day, and thus I should not expect to get from zero to hero in one either. I have been pestered to make a checklist so that my friends and family can keep an eye out for a potential somebody and not have to nudge me at the sight of a guy (I work in an all-women environment, and they can be very enthusiastic).

We debated the merits of a long list or to keep it short and sweet. The Godbrother had a point when he said the Ten Commandments was short but thorough! Should we set up a hotline with numbers for potential callers to HSBC customer service to press to weed out the ineligible?

So here we go again.. I have done this list previously.

Stella's List

1. Able to speak/write/read fluent English. I can't spell and sometimes spellcheck doesn't work.

2. Aged between 24-35 years old inclusive. There is a cap as friends were going to ask their aging building security guard if they wanted the job. -_-

3. Has more earning potential that me. This should be easy peasy as I earn peanuts.

4. Able to do his own laundry/ironing/housework or at least will pay someone else to do it!

5. Be at least 10 cm taller than me. I own some rather nice heels and would like to keep on wearing them thank you very much!

6. Can cook edible food. Otherwise will not complain about my cooking.
7. As smart as I am.
8. Willing to move to a country with clean air and trees of mutual accord when we grow old.

So you see, it isn't that hard to find someone. In fact, if the guy can cook kuching kolo mee or tomato kuay tiaw all the above can be forfeited based on that skill alone. :)

I am not looking for someone who worships the ground I walk on though it would be rather nice to be worshipped. I am not looking for someone who looks like a Greek God, owns a yatch, a 3000 s.q apartment at the Peak, drives a swish car... I just want someone I can be happy with, someone who will notice if I am under the weather and cares enough to bring me a donut/deep fried custard bun/cookie/brownie when I need a pick-me-up. Someone who likes green and purple and is not hopeless with fixing furniture. Someone to anchor me when I fly as to pull me in before I get burnt.

Someone who doesn't like Hello Kitty but will tolerate waking up to one in the mornings.

Cutesy Pics

Yahoo News just reported that Japan has appointed three girls dressed up as Anime/Manga characters as culture ambassadors to the country. Each girl is set to appeal to a different target group with one dressed as a Victorian doll ala goth Lolita; a schoolgirl and a cute bunnyskirted kawaii girl.

This would raise eyebrows in most of the world, bar Cantoland. People here are crazed fans of anything Japanese and cute. They walk about in cute dresses with cute pens in their bags and post-it notes etc. The hospital put a stop to cartoon characters on the name stamp of its' professional employees as to maintain a respectable image. However, I have seen some pink stamps of Dr XYZ with a cute pink Hello Kitty at the side. -_-

They could not stop the population from indulging in their love for all things cute as evidenced by the sheep in the shopping mall display. They not only put sheep in the middle of a perfectly nice shopping mall; they had to make the sheep blush!!

How the Current Economy Affects Us

Today we are going to review an essay that a sixth grader can hand up to his teacher... But then again, this is probably something that every person can relate to in this environment.

How the Current Economy Affects Us
by Stella Chai age 11.

The 75 year old pensioner would probably find his pension isn't worth too much as inflation rises the price of basic necessities.

The 50 year old pre-retiree has just found that his nest egg has shrunk so much he may not be able to retire in as much comfort as he would like to.

The 35 year old family man finds it hard to get another job and he has a mortgage to pay and a family to feed.

The 20 year old student would find the fees have not gone down while the loans will still remain and the employment prospects dire. Oh and quite a few shops have closed.. :(

The 5 year old kid finds that his parents can't afford to buy him a new toy every week anymore. There is also no more ad hoc parties and holidays to exotic lands complete with the penguin balloon (I've always wanted a penguin balloon).

And how does this affect me? After all, working in the public service is considered the 'iron rice bowl' and in the current situation supposedly the most stable profession available. So if yours truly decides to ditch the paycheck in lieu of say lying on the beach.. then it would affect my spending power eventually. :)

As my mother very dryly commented: ' Yea, in this climate, even the guys would be looking for a girl who has a job.' -_- Since when was love dependent on finance?

Two Left Feet

My mother has decided that I have depression/need a hobby. Thus I received a very pleasant email on Friday telling me that:-

a) I should go pick up ballet. I have never done ballet in my life and the only attempt I ever made to shuffle my feet was the Cha Cha.. Okay, and belly dancing but that doesn't have much footwork involved. Besides, ballet traumatises the feet.

b) I should try Tai Chi. My grandfather does Tai Chi at the crack of dawn and I should try it out so that I can wake up at 5.30am to do Tai Chi when I head back to the land of the hornbill.

c) Pick up a musical instrument. My current appreciation of music is having it played to me, not playing it. Though the chinese Gu Zhen would be totally awesome to learn.

Which leaves me to think.. Why didn't she pay for dance classes when I was a kid? My sister does all manner of dance and doesn't have to do any academically linked extracuricular activities. My parents have gone soft *grumble*. They should totally make her do the whole 7am-9pm study schedule like every other kiasu expat brat.

Ticking Boxes

I did this personality test to figure out if I am really a nice person or if my patients say that just to get me to be gentle on them...

Your view on yourself:

You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education:

You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.

The right job for you:

You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

Fence Sitting

This two month notice thing is not getting me anywhere. I am pondering if I have made the right decison? Should I stay or should I go?

There is no right choice, just a well justified tilt of the scales in one direction.

I just want to get married lol... Saves all that trouble on making choices etc and having to pay for my own shoe shipping service ehehe...

I should advertise.